Have you ever wondered if your life mattered? Do you find yourself crippled by insecurity because your appearance or functional abilities don’t match up to those around you? Are you too thin? Too heavy? Too tall? Too short? Or any other host of physical abnormalities? Are you poor? Not of good social standing? A felon? Worse, are you simply invisible? Does no one even seem to notice that you exist?
Joseph Merrick was a man born seemingly normal in 1862 but who later developed physical abnormalities that made him difficult to look at. Physical defects began to develop in his formative years that included bony protrusions, swelling of the face, hands and feet, and loosening skin. So frightening was his appearance that he was unable to make a living and made the decision to show himself to people for money. His story was immortalized in a play and later the movie, “The Elephant Man”. He died when he was 27 years old during the seemingly innocent act of trying to sleep lying down. People speculated that the weight of his head crushed his windpipe.
But Merrick was no idiot. He was fully cognizant of his deformities and forced to come to terms with not only his body but his place in the world. He often read a poem to those who paid to view him up close.
What makes a human being relevant? What is the measure of a man’s worth? Anyone who has ever experienced insecurity because of a physical or emotional ailment has asked this question. Others ask this question in regard to those who are intellectually impaired. I’m not certain I’m qualified to comment on such a weighty question except for the fact that I too have questioned my value and place in this world.
Personal relevance begins with a deeply ingrained sense of identity. The way we view ourselves in correlation to those around us is important. Should we start to believe our life has no value, we despair. Should we overinflate our worth, those around us despair (of being around us!).
For those who are theistically minded, the idea that man was created in the image of God presents a unique vision for the sacredness of the human soul. But that does not mean that atheists and agnostics do not believe in a purpose driven life. I appreciate Kevin Yuill’s poignant case against physician assisted suicide when he states, “But when society legalizes assisted dying, it surely corrupts the fundamental belief in the value of life that underlies all medical treatment.” I would gladly drink coffee with him and discuss why he believes all human life has value outside of a biblical world view. I understand his viewpoint to mean that people who long for death do not have absolute clarity for themselves. Because of this they are therefore dependent on doctors to legitimize/protect their lives. (Hopefully I’m not oversimplifying this.)
A non-believing friend was recently describing her experience with personal adversity and her desire to escape an unfortunate situation. In essence she said, “I want to experience joy. My life has more value than to endure the wrong that is being done to me and to my children. I only get one life and life is too beautiful to waste.” I concur wholeheartedly. I would also posit that the measure of a man is not complete without acknowledging that a person is more than how they are treated by others. We cannot be defined by how others view us because those positions are relative. All human life is beautiful—even magical—if only because we have no capacity to bring it into being. This is why murder is abhorrence. To take that which one cannot create is the ultimate identity theft.
We are not valuable simply because we think, speak or act a certain way. Conversely, our lives do not lack meaning simply because we are not visually appealing or of a certain heritage or royal lineage. Christie Brinkley is not more valuable than Stephen Hawking. Neither does Prince Harry have more worth than Jack Black simply because of his family tree. We all have our place and purpose in this great, mysterious life. Every moment matters, even one that is mundane. The very breath in our lungs indicates that we are more than the sum of our syntheses. That is why racism is immoral, sexism is wicked, and class warfare is iniquitous. What gives us the right to infringe upon the sacred rights of another human being simply because they inconvenience our world view? This is why I believe abortion is an abomination. If we are willing to recognize the terrible wrongness of a tiny kitten glued to the road, we should be able to recognize that the destruction of human life in its most vulnerable form is murder.
I had lunch with a friend this week who doesn’t necessarily conform to societal norms yet is uniquely beautiful. She suffered terribly at the hands of someone she wanted to trust but who lied, manipulated and cheated her for years. She is bravely walking the path she feels her God is directing her to travel, even though those who know and love her best are fearful for where that path will lead. She knows she doesn’t have all the answers and she is faithfully pursuing the fundamental longing we all have to determine our identity and purpose, and to be loved simply for who we are.
This is why I love the story of Jesus Christ. The bible foretold of his birth, “He had no form or majesty that we should look at him, and no beauty that we should desire him. He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not.” (Isaiah 53:2-3) When people devalue human life, I can trust that the God I love does not. He created human life. Jesus came to earth and claimed to be God. He died for the sins of the people who rejected and murdered him in order to reconcile them to himself and then rose from the dead. He sympathizes with my weakness because he too experienced it in human form. I believe that He loves and values all human life and therefore so do I.
Sometimes I develop a sincere longing for relevance. I want to know that I am here for a reason. I want to know that I am more than the size of my waistline, my intellect or my position in society. When I pray and remember Jesus, I am convinced that my soul is just as sacred as those of my non-believing friends. We do not necessarily have to agree on all points to love each other well. Our shared experience in the common framework called life should at the very least enable us to respect the splendor of our diversity.
Today, if you feel lost or hopeless or unloved, I promise that you are not. Keep walking. Your journey is not over yet. Feelings betray us as often as other humans. If you have not arrived at a confident conclusion, keep searching. My prayer for you is simple; that you know the truth and so be set free.
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